Tag: valentines

Unusual Senior Valentine’s Day

On Life and Love after 50 eNewsletter
February 20, 2026
By Columnist Tom Blake
 Today’s On Life and Love After 50 eNewsletter was inspired by comments from Champs, particularly by Carolyn, who said, “I absolutely and unequivocally loved reading last week’s beautiful Valentine’s Day eNewsletter! So much fun to read all about Yoko’s exciting trip to Japan and eating the black eggs. Thanks to her for the fascinating photo of the black eggs! I also loved seeing the Hello Kitty train! Yay!

“I love anything related to Valentine’s Day! I attended a beautiful Valentine’s Day Party with lots of dancing and dinner! Had a fabulous time! I suspect that you and Debbie had an amazing and beautiful Valentine’s Day.
 

Tom’s comment. Since Carolyn mentioned that Debbie’s and my Valentine’s Day together was likely amazing and beautiful, I will expound on it.

A better definition of our day would be unusual. Most of you know that I have been trying to sell my Palm Springs vacation home for a year. It’s been a difficult challenge. It fell out of escrow three times. It has been in escrow a fourth time, and it looks like this time it will sell (hopefully). For those of you who have sold properties recently, you know that a big and challenging part of the process is getting rid of furniture and precious belongings, unless you’re able to sell “as is”. 

Debbie has been a big help in that regard. She has posted items online for sale and dealt with people seeking low-price deals. Some of the large and heavy furniture pieces were a special challenge. She and I spent much of January and early February in Palm Springs as the hoped-for sale neared. There were a few items that either she or I wanted in our Orange County homes. We hired movers who picked those items up on Thursday, February 12. The truck was crammed full. Plus, we each had driven our own automobiles to Palm Springs and loaded each car with the remaining items that didn’t fit in the mover’s truck.

Sadly, there were six items that wouldn’t fit in our cars. We were going to have to leave them behind. We thought our realtor, Maureen, might store them in her garage until we could make another trip out there, but we knew that was asking a lot of her. And I was not up for another trip to Palm Springs, at least not for another week. 

The moving truck left at 11 a.m. with a first stop at Debbie’s place in Mission Viejo. She drove separately to her home in her car, loaded with items. I drove away shortly thereafter, a little sad and emotional, realizing that an enjoyable eight-year period of my Palm Springs life was ending, and arrived in Dana Point around 1:30 p.m. The moving truck arrived at 8:30 p.m. and left about 9:30. I was exhausted. My garage was full. 

The next morning, Friday, the 13th, Debbie called and said she had planned to drive back to Palm Springs that day to pick up the six items, but she had injured her ankle with all the lifting and movement, so she was going to drive out on Valentine’s Day instead to try to load the remaining items in her car. I didn’t want her to do that on Valentine’s Day by herself (or any day, for that matter), and I knew those six items would not all fit in her car. So, I drove the two of us in my Honda SUV, which had more room, on Valentine’s Day to Palm Springs and back, which took seven hours.

We were both exhausted, but we laughed at how the two of us seniors were spending our romantic Valentine’s Day. The remaining six pieces fit in my car, but a large clay pot was on the floor of her passenger seat, so her knees were crunched up and bent the whole way back. Now the romantic part of our Valentine’s Day: a lunch together on our return trip to the coast. 

We stopped at the Morongo Casino gas station off the I-10 freeway to fill the tank ($1 a gallon cheaper vs other gas stations). An IN-N-OUT Burger restaurant was 50 yards away from the gas pumps. We splurged with a romantic lunch. Debbie had a grilled cheese sandwich; I had a cheeseburger. We split an order of fries and a small diet Coke.

So, Carolyn, our “amazing and beautiful” Valentine’s Day didn’t quite fit that description, but it was memorable, a day we won’t forget. 

More Champ Comments MK (a woman), “As usual, I enjoyed your eclectic column.You do a great service by offering a venue for people to share their stories. I’m happy for you that your selling ordeal is nearly over. Tom’s response, “I’m still waiting for the final phone call to hear that the Palm Springs home has been sold and I hope it’s within 3-4 days.”  

Pony Lady, “I loved all the comments about Valentine’s Day. It’s interesting how people feel differently about it.” 

Lynn, Santa Margarita, CA, “Thanks for last week’s lovely eNewsletter. WELL, DONE! I did a bit of an early Valentine’s gift for myself. On Feb 5, I wanted a happy-color for my jump-into-my-first-hybrid car. I call her honeybee! Her 600 miles per 11.9-gallon tank is hard to beat! Thanks for all your newsletters…they are so fun & eye opening! “We all really do make our own happiness, making fun where’s there’s none is my mantra! Wishing you a GREAT WEEKEND!” 

Tom’s response, “Beautiful car–way to go!  “While not new, I call my 2013 Honda CRV Leo.” And often thank him for getting me safely to places. Lynn’s naming her car spawned an unusual topic for next week’s eNewsletter; even a little strange, a little weird, but kind of cute. After all, we older seniors need things that entertain us and keep us happy. 

So, Champs, if you still drive a car or own a car, do you name your car, and if so, what name, year, and type of car? Why did you pick that name? Please let me know.

Valentines 2025

Home in Dana Point, CA celebrates Valentine’s Day Photo by Tom Blake

On Life and Love after 50 eNewsletter – February 7, 2025
By Columnist Tom Blake

Valentine’s Day 2025

Valentine’s Day is intended to be a day of celebration and love. However, as we Champs age, it becomes more difficult for me to get excited about Valentine’s Day.

I don’t want to be a downer this year or ruin some couples’ happiness. However, let me share my thoughts on Valentine’s Day 2025. I think about the people in California who have suffered by losing their homes or being evacuated from their homes in the January wildfires. For them Valentine’s Day will only be another day on their 2025 calendars. Perhaps they will endure Valentine’s Day together by sharing a meal and a Champagne toast in a friend’s home, temporary housing, or a pricey hotel.

Valentine’s Day won’t have much meaning for them in 2025. I know how they feel firsthand. A fraternity brother who has been my friend for 60 years lives in Altadena, California. He and his wife were evacuated from their home by firemen on January 8 with a loud knock on their door at 5 a.m., telling them to evacuate “Now.” Miraculously, their concrete and steel home is still standing, while the entire neighborhood within a half-mile radius around them was destroyed.

They and their grandkids had no place to stay. My Palm Springs vacation home was vacant. It became their home for nearly three weeks. They still cannot return to their home as the authorities won’t let them. It will be another month or two. 

And now, the families of the two tragic plane crashes back East won’t be celebrating Valentine’s Day. Enough said about that. In 2024, my Valentine’s Day column explained why I keep Valentine’s Day low-key.

A woman had approached me in Costco to ask what the On Life and Love After 50 columnist had planned for Valentine’s Day. I thought she expected to hear me describe something fancy such as a romantic evening at one of the nearby 5-star hotels or fancy new restaurants in Dana Point. 

Instead, I said, “I haven’t made any Valentine’s Day plans. My significant other and I will experience our first Valentine’s Day together. Whatever we decide, it will be something simple.” 

The Costco acquaintance said, “Why simple? You’ve written about senior love for 31 years, surely, you have some Valentine’s advice for senior singles.” 

I said, “I’ve never been a fan of Valentine’s Day. Granted, it’s good for the economy. However, certain businesses mount such an overwhelming marketing blitz, that I feel it takes some of the romance out of Valentine’s Day. Not to mention the prices for meals and entertainment that prevail on that day.” 

The woman at Costco said she was going out with friends for lunch on Valentine’s to save money and not be alone. Her comment made me think of the Roy Orbison song “Only The Lonely” with these words:

“Only the lonely know the way I feel tonight. There goes my baby. There goes my heart. They’re gone forever. So far apart.”

The link to that song is listed below.

I replied, “It’s great you have friends to share that day. But, like New Year’s Eve, Valentine’s Day can make people without a mate feel lonelier than they already are. That’s why I avoid making Valentine’s Day a big deal in my columns and eNewsletters. I don’t want lonely people to feel even worse.”
 
And now, in 2025, I look back a year. I have friends and column readers whose spouses and/or partners passed away in 2024. I have friends who are fighting serious health issues. A widow wrote me this week: “Not exactly young (76) but I still work as a nurse part-time. Love the beach and would love some companionship. Live in Illinois.” 

Valentine’s Day this year will be tough on those people mentioned above. Taped to my desktop is this message I read somewhere online. It’s in my handwriting; I copied it shortly after my partner of 25 years-Greta- passed away: 

We can all fight against loneliness by engaging in random acts of kindness. The most thoughtful thing we as seniors can do on Valentine’s Day is reach out to lonely friends who may be spending the day or night alone. Invite them to join you for lunch or dinner. Share the love of the day with them. And look after them during the rest of the year.

Loneliness isn’t just a Valentine’s Day reality for seniors, it’s year around. A Valentine’s rose or orchid for your sweetheart or a friend is always appreciated. 

Details about the song Only The Lonely

The most famous recording by Orbison of Only The Lonely was at the Cocoanut Grove in Los Angeles on September 30, 1987, on the A Black and White Night album. Check it out below and see if you spot Jackson Browne, Bruce Springsteen, Elvis Costello, Bonnie Raitt, J D Souther and K.D. Lang, among others playing.

Link to Only The Lonely