Hope Lives On

On Love and Life After 50 eNewsletter

April 17, 2026

Columnist Tom Blake

On January 10, 2025, the eNewsletter was titled, “False Hope.” It was about a Champ named Ann, not her true name, who wrote that she had met a man named Ben (name changed also) whose wife had had Alzheimer’s Disease for 10 years.Ben’s wife still lived at home under his care. On Christmas Day, 2024, Ben contacted Ann and they met for a glass of wine that day and found they were attracted to each other, especially Ann attracted to Ben.

Ann emailed me often in early 2025 about her encounters with Ben. On May 26, 2025, Ann emailed me, “I heard from Ben on Mother’s Day, remember him with the Alzheimer wife? He lovingly wished me happy Mother’s Day and, of course, I was over the moon.

The next eNewsletter, January 17, 2025 (Both eNewsletters can be read on my FindingLoveAfter50.com website, featured 22 responses from Champs about the brief encounter Ann had with Ben. Almost all responses felt Ben was cheating on his wife and Ann was totally out of line.

“I thanked him and said I thought of him and hoped he was well. He also texted me on Easter, this coming from a man who wanted the door closed. I responded.

Last week, she emailed again.

“I have no idea how his wife is doing, apparently, she’s still here and things might be the same. I think you know how I feel about Ben; he is still the one for me.”

“Then, in the evening he responded to my text and said he also thought of me and here comes the next thing that sent me shivers, he said maybe someday we can go out for dinner.

Ann emailed me several times in 2025 and early 2026, always writing about Ben.

“I have been seeing Ben, I believe I wrote you after he bailed again but I did not follow up with what happened after. The next day, after the breakup, he texted me, it was heartbreaking to read how he poured out his heart.

“He said he didn’t know what had come over him, that life was so stressful with his wife still alive, but lovingly taken care every day and night.

“Ben said he had deep feelings for me and didn’t want to lose me, could I please forgive him and could we talk. We did and got some things straightened out; I felt more understanding as this continues to be a difficult situation for us both.

“Ben tries hard to include me in his life; he has a very busy business plus he visits his wife (living separately in their home) a couple of times a day.

“He obviously loves her and makes sure she has every comfort possible; I love that about him as well as other things. You know Tom, I have loved Ben for over a year, and I believe he had strong feelings about me and decided last Christmas to visit me again.

“Tom, there is never a guarantee in life, not for me, not for you or anyone for that matter.

“I believe I told you about our reunion, we just flew into each other’s arms after 10 months and almost cried with joy.
He had that little one-day setback but promised to never hurt me again.

“Ben has been loving and considerate since, we have gone out to dinner, to lunch and we see each other once a week, sometimes like this week, twice for lunch.

“We visit each other’s homes, and I feel comfortable in his house.
He holds my hand during lunch, kisses me frequently and thinks I am eye candy, a cute expression he uses.

“As I mentioned, it’s not ideal, I want to see more of him but know the limits, don’t want to push it and let him talk about his pain, (his wife and both daughters he lost a few years ago).

“It now has been almost three months of being together, I know he loves me and I am loving him.

“I am older now, it feels right to be with Ben and one day, we can spend more time together once his wife is no longer with us.
I am grateful for this love.”