On Life and Love after 50 eNewsletter December 22, 2023 Has Senior Dating Changed in 17 Years? By Tom Blake Senior Dating Columnist |
This week, when checking my computer archives, I found this article I published in 2006: “Tom’s 13 Senior Dating Tips.” I wondered if senior dating has changed since writing that article 17 years ago. Here’s the list from back then. See if you notice anything you’d change as we head into Christmas and 2024. Tom’s 13 Senior Dating Tips from 2006 1. Get off the couch, out of the house, and involved in hobbies and activities you enjoy. By doing so, you’ll meet people with similar interests. Join a club. Volunteer. Travel. Go back to school. Take a part-time job. Get out with new people 2. Don’t go out solely to seek a mate. You’ll come off as desperate. Go out to enrich your life and have fun. People often meet a mate when they aren’t looking and when they least expect it 3. Be assertive, but not aggressive. Seize every opportunity to introduce yourself to someone you think is single, and to whom you’re attracted. It’s difficult for some seniors to do this, but they may miss meeting a good match if they let the opportunity slide. Be prepared with a conversation icebreaker, something like, “Would you like to have coffee?” 4. Always carry a name card with you, giving potential dates an easy way to contact you. Include safe, secure information: List only your first name, either a phone or answering service number, or an email address that doesn’t contain your last name 5. Be happy, positive, and friendly. Smile 6. Socialize with friends of both sexes. Women need women friends 7. Have a nice appearance, firm up and get in shape 8. Don’t take rejection personally. It will happen. Put it behind you and move on 9. Trust your instincts. Avoid losers, scammers, and phonies. Beware of romance scams originating on the Internet from Africa and other foreign countries 10. Network with friends, relatives, and business associates. Repeatedly remind them to introduce you to their single acquaintances 11. Protect your assets. Women need to be in control of their own money 12. It’s important to realize that you aren’t the only person without a mate, there are millions of seniors in the same situation, faced with the same issues and having the same feelings 13. Never give up hope. Senior dating is a numbers game. The more you’re out there, the better your chances. Seventeen years later, seven changes in December 2023 A. Cell phones have replaced answering machines and answering services, the phones are an imperative dating tool with texting and voice mail conveniences B. The most noticeable change is the dramatic increase in online dating websites and online dating. It’s estimated that more than 50 percent of single seniors have tried Internet dating. Scammers are rampant. Seniors must be careful and trust their instincts. C. Plus, Meetup.com lists many places for seniors to meet others (and while doing so, maybe meet a potential mate) D. Item 6 above mentioned, “Women need women friends.” That is still true, and this needs to be added in 2023: “Men need men friends.” I honestly don’t know what I would have done after losing Greta, my mate of 25 years, if I hadn’t had my guy friends to talk about the grief, sadness, and emptiness one feels E. Those guy friends include Jim Fallon, a widower after 47 years of marriage. And Mike Stipher, Vince The Hat Man, John Hawkins, Tom Blosser, Don Cheley, Bob Rossi, Charlie Canfield, Bob Peters, Alex the Sports Barber, and neighbors Alex Torres and Jake Racker. I’m sure there are others. They always ask how I’m doing and are willing to listen to my senior dating woes and experiences F. An age difference between partners wasn’t mentioned in the 2006 list of tips. Now that we are 17 years older, and reflecting on, as Bob Dylan sang in 1973, “Knock, knock, knocking on Heaven’s Door.” (link below) The age difference is a hot topic now. Women often accuse men of wanting a younger woman. And yet, a woman Champ, 78, wrote me this week that her boyfriend is 48. Another woman Champ from Florida reports that she is dating a guy 20 years younger. G. To add to the list: “Men also need to protect their money.” Both men and women should be diligent and careful. For those of you celebrating Christmas, have a Merry one. For those who aren’t, enjoy the Holidays as well. Thanks for being Champs. I look forward to seeing you next year. I will likely be taking December 29 off. It will be fun to track the senior dating changes in 2024. Link to “Knocking On Heaven’s Door.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGB1P1jKIoE |