January 20, 2023, On Life and Love After 50 eNewsletter  Tom Tom Blake on Standup Paddle Board Jan 20, 2023, with no one in sight (photo by Linda A)On Life and Love after 50 eNewsletter January 27, 2023 Around Dana Point Island By Columnist Tom Blake Before I begin with today’s article, I wanted to apologize that you weren’t able to view or listen to the Podcast that was recorded yesterday. When it becomes available in April or later, I will let you know. I was under the impression that it would be available live, but it wasn’t. Thanks. Around Dana Point Island On New Year’s Day, I saw an article in the online NY Times titled, “The 7-Day Happiness Challenge,” which featured a tip for each day for seven days. I admit that it was a sad day for me missing my Greta so I was eager to read something that might make me happy. (Greta my partner for 25 years passed on October 29, 2022) The articles had a lot of good advice on how people can make their lives happier. One article stated that social fitness is as important to one’s health as physical fitness. It stressed the necessity of social interaction–getting out of the house and interacting with people. It made me realize how important that is for me during my period of grieving. I promised myself to be friendlier with people I didn’t even know. Last Friday was a gorgeous sunny day in Dana Point, California, where I live. The residents here had been bashed by nine powerful rainstorms for a couple of weeks. At about 11 a.m., because there was no wind, I decided to go Standup Paddle Boarding in Dana Point Harbor. A phenomenon called King Tides was beginning. That’s where the tides are extremely high and/or extremely low and can be treacherous. When I launched from Baby Beach to paddle around Dana Point Island, a distance of roughly two miles or more depending on detours and side trips, I noticed I was the only person on the water. I had the whole darn harbor to myself, except for groups of sea lions who were camped on a few docks and barking loudly at each other and whatever else they bark at. By the way, Dana Point Island is the same setting where our January 6 eNewsletter called, “I’m betting on the chair” occurred. You may recall that a woman yelled those words to a man who was wrestling with a blue lawn chair that wouldn’t fold. They became a couple. About a quarter mile into my paddle, I noticed a person paddling a small yellow kayak about 75 yards ahead of me, heading in the same direction as I was heading. Slowly, I was gaining on the kayak even though I wasn’t trying to. When I got alongside the kayak, about 10 yards to the side, a small boat went by us and created a wake, forcing the kayaker and me to turn into the wake. If you take a wake broadside on a paddle board or kayak, it can dump you into the water. The kayaker was a woman, wearing the biggest sunglasses I’d ever seen. I couldn’t guess her age or what she looked like because her face was virtually covered. I said to her, “Did you believe that wake?” She said, “Yes, it was tricky. But what a beautiful day. I’m Lynda, what’s your name?” “Tom.” Remembering the NY Times article about being social, I asked, “Do you kayak often?” She said, “I work. So, I usually only kayak on weekends. Today I have the day off.” “Where do you work?” “In Laguna Beach, at three different veterinarian offices. I love coming here.” “Is that where you live?” I asked. “In South Laguna,” she said, “I moved here from Ohio a year ago.” By then, I could tell by her voice that she was probably considerably younger than me. I said, “Ohio? Oh no. Are you an Ohio State Buckeye fan? I’m originally from Michigan, a Wolverine fan.” She said, “Oh, do you mean that dreaded team up north?” I about fell off my board. That’s how Woody Hayes, Ohio State’s most famous coach, referred to the Michigan football team. I answered, “And yah, I’m Bo Schembechler (Michigan’s most famous coach).” We both laughed. And then she said, “Can I kayak with you around the island? It’s pretty lonely out here with no one to chat with.” “I would love that,” I replied. And that’s what we did. I admired Lynda’s enthusiasm and positive attitude. She said she had a daughter in college back in Ohio. We talked about all kinds of stuff, even about my losing Greta. She said, “Are you still working?” “Yes, I said, “I’m a newspaper columnist.” “What do you write about? She asked. “Dating After 50.” Lynda replied, “Oh wow, I’m almost there.” Her comment didn’t surprise me; I assumed she was in her mid 40s. Our paddling together lasted about an hour. In the parking lot, she removed her sunglasses. I said to myself, “Oh wow, she’s an attractive woman, and way too young for an old dude like me.” I moved my car close to her car. We chatted while securing our boards atop the roof racks. “Can we paddle together again?” Lynda asked. “You are busier than I, so let me know when you will be available,” I said and handed her my Tom Blake Publishing business card. I thought to myself: there’s that darn limited availability issue surfacing again. We gave each other a hug and waved goodbye. A new friendship had been born. Later in the day, Linda texted me the above photo she had taken of me from her yellow kayak and said, “I read some of your articles, pretty touching. It is so nice some of your readers found a new love.” I texted back, asking if she was kayaking that weekend. “I can’t. It’s Lunar New Year. I will be spending quality time with my California family and friends.” I had thought that Lynda looked as if she might be of Asian descent. Her Lunar New Year mention confirmed my thought. And then on Sunday morning, I heard the news about the mass shooting at a dance studio during a Lunar New Year celebration in Monterey Park, a suburb of Los Angeles, and another attempted Lunar New Year shooting in Alhambra. I prayed, “Please God, tell me that Lynda is ok.” I knew I couldn’t handle the loss of a friend, on top of losing Greta. I texted Lynda, writing that because of the shooting, I was worried about her and hoped she was okay. There was no answer–until 12:34 p.m. on Sunday when she sent a photo of the temple where she was with her friends, along with this text, “My friends and I are safe. My daughter in Ohio is good. Thanks for your concern.” I texted, “New friends are precious.” She replied with a heart above the message When we are nice to people we meet, smile, and are friendly, we never know who might enter our life, even in the most unusual of locations. |
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Since 1994, Tom Blake has been a newspaper columnist on the topic of finding love after 50
On Life and Love after 50 