You Look Like My Neighbor

On Life and Love After 50 eNewsletter

December 24, 2022

By Columnist Tom Blake

A friendly, warm, Christmas-week story

“You look like my neighbor”

This past Sunday — 50 days after my partner Greta passed away — I decided to get out of the house and exercise by taking a walk in the neighborhood. It was a beautiful, sunny day, with a bit of a chill in the air for Southern California. About 60 degrees.

I came upon a woman walking her dog. I had seen her several times in the neighborhood, but we had never talked, other than to say hello. She was always friendly. Her name is Lilly. I was aware that she was married to Jim, whose company had done some home improvement work at Greta’s home several years before. Lilly and Jim live a five-minute walk away from us.

She asked, “How is your wife?” I mustered the courage to tell her that Greta had passed away. Lilly was shocked, gracious, and expressed her condolences. We talked for maybe six minutes. She touched my hand and told me how sorry she was.

The next day, Monday, December 19, I was in the Capistrano Beach Costco, in the bread aisle. I noticed a woman walking in the same aisle. She looked like Lilly.

I said, “You look like my neighbor.”

She said, “You look like my neighbor. Where do you live?”

“In Monarch Beach,” I replied.

“Me also,” she said. “Oh my gosh, I’m Lilly, we talked yesterday.” I guess I didn’t recognize her because she didn’t have her dog with her. We had a big laugh.

Lilly said, “Do you like chili?”

“Yes, love it.”

She said, “I made chili last night. We have some left over. I will drop some off a little later.”

In the checkout lines, we waved at each other and held up identical sourdough bread packages that each of us had purchased. Don’t neighbors think alike, I thought?

A short while after unloading the groceries from my car into the house, I heard a knock on the front door. I opened it. It was Jim, Lilly’s husband, with a chilled container of chili in his hands. I invited Jim in, and we chatted.

I said, “How long have you and Lilly been together?

“17 years.”

“How did you meet?”

“Online. On Match.com. She’s the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me.”

I said, “Where is Lilly from?”

“Costa Rica.”

I showed him a copy of the How 50 Couples Found Love After 50 book. I said, “Darn, had I known you two, I would have included your story in the book.

Jim said, “We wouldn’t have qualified. I was 43 when I met her. She was younger.”

I said, “You are right. You two would have been too young for the book. But it still goes to show that Internet dating can bring people together, regardless of age, and even when they live thousands of miles apart.”

I signed a book: “To Jim, Lilly and the Puppy Dog.” And gave it to Jim.

Moral of today’s story. When you’re out and about, be friendly, talk to people. You never know what you’ll have in common. Jim and Lilly live 100 yards away from me. And now, I have two new friends.

And by the way, Lilly’s chili was unbelievable. Jim told me, “Each time she makes it, she makes it a bit differently. It’s always scrumptious. We’ll bring you more when she prepares again.”

I said, “Promise?”

“Yes. Each time.”

Yippee.

Happy Holidays, everybody. I love you all. Thank you for your support.

And to all Champs who are dealing with the loss of a loved one, you, particularly, are in our thoughts